The Birds & the Bees

Ms. Jenny, one of Tyler's teachers, is very pregnant so I can only imagine this is why we had this recent conversation in the car (he saves the deep stuff for when I'm distracted with driving).

Tyler: "Mama, when I grow up will I be a daddy?"
Me: "Well, first you grow up into a man. Then you marry a woman you're madly in love with. Then you become a daddy."
Tyler: "I can't wait until I'm a daddy so I can marry you."
Me: "Well, you can't marry me silly because I'm already married to Daddy!"
Tyler: "Yeah. So when I marry a girl I will become a daddy?"
Me: "You don't marry girls. When you are a man, you will find a woman you love. Then you'll get married. Then you can become a daddy."
Tyler: "So when I get married I will have a baby in the girls belly?"
Me (shuddering): "Oh, um well the baby comes after you get married."
Tyler: "But that's not what Ms. Jenny is doing."
Me: "Well then she's doing it wrong. The right way is what I said. That's what I did. That's what you will do. Grow up. Become a man. Find a woman. Fall in love. Get married. Have a baby. Oh, is that a school bus ahead of us? Who wants to sing the wheels on the bus?"